Choices and Courage: Lessons from the Bench

Today, my nephew sat the bench during his high school baseball game.

Not because he's a poor player. Quite the opposite—he’s the star. Not because of poor grades—he’s a straight-A student. And certainly not due to poor sportsmanship—he's a natural leader on and off the field. He sat because he missed practice.

This seems fair, doesn't it? Missing practice often means sitting out; it teaches responsibility and commitment.

But context matters.

The Impossible Choice

My nephew missed baseball practice due to a mandatory track meet. As a dual-sport athlete every spring—approved by his coaches and athletic director—he typically manages both sports seamlessly. But when rain shifted this week's baseball practice schedule, he was faced with an impossible decision:

• Attend baseball practice and disappoint his track team.

• Compete at the mandatory track meet and risk disappointing his baseball teammates.

  
  

He chose the meet.

As a result, he spent today's game on the bench. But he didn’t sulk. He cheered loudly for his teammates, helped gather equipment, retrieved bats, and even joined them in punitive sprints afterward, despite not having played a single inning. Watching him gracefully handle this disappointment immediately reminded me of a similar moment from my own high school experience.

My Own Bench Moment

My senior year, after lettering three times in track, four times in cross country, and once in volleyball, I was denied my final varsity letter. Why? I missed a single track meet to attend a unique opportunity to meet former U.S. Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, who presented to me as a student activist.

It wasn't just prestigious—it was a rare chance to engage directly with one of the influential Democratic leaders of that era. As someone deeply committed to activism and eager to grow into my own voice and purpose, this event felt incredibly significant. Yet it forced me into what felt like an impossible choice: either disappoint my coach or pass up an experience that might profoundly shape my future.

I chose personal growth over immediate recognition, knowing deep down that opportunities like these rarely come twice.

While missing that meet cost me the final star on my letterman jacket, it wasn't a blemish on my record—it was a badge of courage. It symbolized something deeper than athletic accomplishment: proof that I followed my heart even when the consequences stung, and that integrity mattered more than applause.

Reflecting on Your Own Choices

Each of us faces moments when choices must be made, and the outcomes rarely come without some cost. These decisions reveal our true values and character.

Take a moment to reflect:

• Can you recall a time when you made a difficult choice that cost you recognition, praise, or an opportunity?

• Did you follow your heart or the expectations of others?

• What did that choice teach you about your personal values?

• How has that decision shaped your sense of self and future decisions?

  
  

Courage Isn’t Always Loud

My nephew’s choice today is preparing him for life. Decisions rarely get easier; they become more complex, nuanced, and impactful as we grow. But practicing courage—even quietly, from a bench—helps us build resilience for life's more significant choices.

Real courage doesn't always receive applause. Sometimes, it gathers bats, runs sprints, or quietly supports from the sidelines.

Your Badge of Courage

Take a moment to admire yourself—not from regret or judgment, but with pride:

• What "missing star" or unseen act of bravery do you carry?

• How did it make you stronger, more authentic, and aligned with your values?

Moving Forward with Bravery

Every decision, especially those that cost us something, strengthens our character. They teach us to remain aligned with who we are and what truly matters.

Ultimately, our toughest choices—often the quietest and least celebrated—reveal our deepest truths. Embrace these invisible badges of courage, knowing they form the very foundation of who you are.

Today, I invite you to embrace your own badges of courage. Remember, bravery isn't just about visible victories—it's about staying true to your heart even when no one else notices.

Your courageous choices shape who you become. Wear them proudly.